Bath, North Carolina

Bath is a sleepy little village located on a scenic point where Bath Creek and Back Creek flow into the Pamlico River. When I was walking around town, I met several friendly and hospitable residents. Shopping and services are limited – I counted only two restaurants and one service station. Bath was the first nominal capital of North Carolina and is the states oldest town, celebrating its 300th anniversary in 2005. According to the record books, between it’s founding in 1705 and 1708, Bath’s population had 'swelled' to 50 people and 12 houses. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, as of 2008, this burgeoning metropolis has exploded to a population of 268. Permit me to do the arithmetic for you. In 300 years, the town has gained a total of 218 people. I’m not paranoid, but this smells of a sinister conspiracy. Either a local save-the-planet ecomaniac is spiking the water supply with contraceptives, alien spacecraft are abducting these tarheel newborns, or a 350-year-old axe murderer still lurks in the shadows. You think me unbalanced? Stranger things have happened, my friend. I’m not schizophrenic and neither am I.